Thursday, December 31, 2009

One Year Quitters



JK17 - Hello all! I posted in May 09 but I guess I am supposed to be here. 1 week quit.
JK17 - Day 8 - nic free today!
JK - 10. Welcome the double the digits.





PbKid - Introduction
I've chewed tobacco for 27 years. I'm about to turn 42. Copenhagen was a quarter when I started. I guess it was baseball, but I was never really all that good a center fielder, anyway. Can't even play anymore, the pathology of my right shoulder might fill an entire semester at med school. Time marches on.

I'm an engineer - work in an office like Dilbert. I have a wife I'm still in love with and two great kids, 8 and 10. The youngest is autistic - his diagnosis brought me to my knees and to the edge of life. Both of my brothers and my father-in-law are alcoholics with about a billion years of sobriety between them. I realized not long ago that none of my friends chew any more - just sort of evolved that way without me noticing. You see, I have every reason to quit and, moreover, to succeed at it.

All behavior has a payoff, a reason behind it. I chewed because it made me feel less anxious. But the habit itself also made me anxious. The Quit has been one of those things I know I gotta do but would rather just ignore. I've been avoiding it for so long now. It nags and gnaws at me. Now my number's up. Events past and present bring my level of angst to new heights. The payoff for quitting has grown to be bigger than the payoff for chewing.

I don't know how to tune an engine, clean gutters, play golf, or ski without a dip in my mouth. Thinking about these and a hundred other similar activities without chew pretty much blows. That's why I'm here. I plan to take it one day at a time and when I get to those days I'll be asking for help. Thanks for the offer.

PbKid - 1 - I want this bad.
PbKid – 2

PBKid
Hola.
Since I can remember, it's always been the same. 1. brush teeth, 2. pack one, 3. turn on the shower & clean fingers off. Today I decided to do something different.
I've also decided to suffer with like-minded people today. Yeah, you guessed it, I'm going to work. I work in an cube farm, Dilbert-style. Nobody there chews. I plan to tell 'em I don't feel well (thanx beaver).
I've also decided to give my word to a bunch of like-minded people I don't know that I will not chew today. Wings are re-entry red hot but I'm not gonna chew today.

PbKid - I have one other matter to report at this time.
I pass a house coming into our neighborhood that sits atop a hill with a very large flag of the United States of America on a really big post. It's the guy that started Sage, if you are familiar with the fly fishing equipment.

Anyway, for the last week or so I've been seeing that flag waving in the breeze on the way home from work and my mind *snaps* the image ---> Ready.

So, it's kinda cool because I think about Ready, KTC, being quit, and freedom pretty much every day coming home now - about 2 minutes after passing the c store I used to frequent.

Keep quit.

QUOTE (edromero @ Jan 20, 2009, 12:48 pm)
QUOTE (quit_aug_27_08 @ Jan 20, 2009, 2:17 pm)
You will move past the crave ND - it's tough and no one is denying it.
ive sed this bfore, and ill say it again because it helps me... i know its tough.
but whenever i think its tough, i think of that hiker who cut off his own arm with a pocketknife when he got trapped under a boulder for 3 days.
what would you endure if your life depended on it?
how tough do we really have it?
10 years from now, with the "tough times" matter to us anymore? probably not.
fuck it. bring on the pain.

PbKid - Bring it.

PbKid - day 3
PbKid - 4 - not today either
PbKid - 5 - It's fun to quit. No chew today.

what's the best thing about being quit?
PbKid - Not worrying about quitting






2jet - Hello to all!
This is my first day on this site and today was day 1 of my quit.
It's been a bitch of a day so far. I've never been so irritable and lightheaded. I feel like I can't keep a thought in my head for more than a few seconds. I know it will get better, but it's been a long day.
I was a Cope man for over 15 years. 4 to 5 cans a week. I would beat myself up all the time for not having the "balls" to quit that shit. Everytime I would try and quit I would come up with some lame excuse for postponing my quit. "it's to stressful at work right now"..... "not until after vacation" etc. etc...
I'm committed this time and will be posting roll tomorrow morning.
I look forward to quitting with the rest of you.
Regards,
Matt (2jet)

2jet - Day 2. This site is great. I never thought I could do it before, but now I have hope.

2jet - Day 3. Fighting with the Nic bitch today, but I'm gonna kick her ass.
2jet - Day 4. Yesterday sucked. Feel better this morning. No nic for me today.
2jet - Day 4. I got edited out for some reason a few posts ago. I'm still here



camojfk day 1
Camojfk - Day 1 ***Welcome Camo--please don't try to fix what's been fixed before you figure out what you broke!! You're doin' GREAT! Welcome aboard!!
Note by TCOPE: If you ever look back at Camo's 1st post it fucked up roll royally! Quitting Time fixed it
camojfk day 2
camojfk #3
camojfk #4 1st weekend down
camojfk - QUIT DIPPING OR GET THE FUCK OUT
camojfk #5 put up or shut up/quitter 4 life




BigDBingo - Ok guys, I'm in. Today is my quit. Killed a can of pouches yesterday, bummed a dip off my brother last night, and woke up this morning determined to kill this habit. I was able to avoid my usual shower dip this morning, and so far havent had a work dip yet today. i have three pieces of super strong gum packed in where the dip would be, feeling the minty burn. I think this quit will be my final quit.

BigDBingo - Day 1. thanks for having me.
BigDBingo - Day 2 - Doin fine so far. Yesterday was tough, but I made it. I am stronger than Skoal.
BigDBingo - Day 3, no worries.







ScubaSteve - Quit Day 2, first day here though.

Hello all. I began my quit Tuesday night on the way home from work. I thought to myself..."why is it that I can tell my wife all my secrets, my passions, my worries, my desires....but you won't tell her this one other piece of your life. I don't know if I'm the only one out there who's done the same, but I have used the junk for 7 years. My wife knew about me doing it a month after we started dating. I told her I would quit and did so for 9 months. Went hunting, started dipping again. I have since been married (almost 2 years). She doesn't know I do this.
What kind of pathetic POS's are we to try to hide something from our spouses? Something so major! Something that will kill us! I guess for me it's cause I know my wife told me (when we were dating) that if I ever started doing it again she would break up with me. Now we're married and I know she won't leave me over it anymore, but it kills me to think of how it will make her feel when she knows I am an addict.
I had a year long stint in law enforcement. I don't feel any better than the crackheads and dopefiends that I busted up. Hell, I even stole cans from my college roomate at A&M. Pathetic.
This is my "declaration of dependence". I've confessed my wrongdoings to a bunch of strangers, and tonight I confess my lies to my wife. I'm definitely doing this for myself. The last time I tried, I did ok for 9 months, but that was because it was instigated by a threat from my girlfriend.
Good people, keep me accountable, and I will do my best to do the same for you. And to the vets, I've read through your HOF speeches, and some of the admin posts, and I want to thank you in advance because this is the support I need.



SWJ - Day #2 - I've never tried to quit before, but am somehow convinced that I can do it on the first try... We shall see.
SWJ - Day #3 No Worries.
SWJ - Day #4.







This was one of my favorite posts by SWJ
SWJ - 16 Feb 2009
Yesterday, I decided to cave.
36 days ago, I decided to stop dipping, for the sake of my wife and two little boys. I used dip tobacco for years, and really, genuinely enjoyed it. However, three weeks ago I decided to stop, for the three most important people in my life.
And I did. Cold turkey. Frankly, it was pretty easy. I found the KTC site and posted every day, I read the posts from dudes who were having a really tough time with their Quit, and I posted a few words of encouragement. I had never tried to quit before, but I was really proud of having gone three weeks without any tobacco.
But yesterday I decided to cave.
My wife and two boys left for a week on vacation. This, my friends, would be prime dipping time - I could put a wad of Grizzly in, sit in front of the TV, and just enjoy it... I literally thought about it for a week. To be honest, I could hardly wait.
They left. I waved to them. And I made two more decisions...
I Will Always Be Stronger Than Any Vice. And I Will Never Cave.
The verbal abuse that I would get in my Quit Forum here on KTC doesn't scare me in the least - If I ever decided to cave, I just wouldn't show up here anymore.
But I would know.
I would know that I was weak. And I Am Not Weak.
I would know that I let my family down. And They Are Everything To Me.
I would know that I lied to my boys. And I Am The Greatest Dad Ever.
I am a husband.
I am a father.
I am a member of KTC April 2009.
And I Am A Quitter.




NKT - Day 1 - no nicotine for me today
NKT - Day 2 - insomnia rocks
NKT - Day 3 - Rooster get your ass back in here. Vets: lighten up a little, some of us might be just hanging on by a thread and it's not cool to fuck with us so early. Fire it up in a couple of weeks, we might have a sense of humor then.
NKT - 11 January 2009----After 12 years with a can-a-day-or-more copenhagen habit, I’m on day 12 of a quit using a very abbreviated nicoderm patch system (about one week on each “step”). I’ve had some serious withdrawls and cravings, but it’s getting better. I’ve run into a bit of a challenge today:
My wife and daughter just left town to visit family…
For six days.
Oh shit.
This is the time I’d usually take the can out of hiding and dip at will. What do I do now? Any suggestions on how to get through this would be much appreciated.
One other thing: would anyone be offended if I participate in the roll call if I stick to the patch program EXACTLY as outlined below?
12/31/08 – 1/9/09 21mg patch for 16 hours
1/10/08 – 1/16/08 14mg patch for 16 hours
1/17/08 – 1/23/08 7mg patch for 16 hours
The reasoning behind the patch program is that I can’t afford to be going through a set of really severe withdrawl symptoms because nobody in my life, aside from my wife, knows I used to chew, or that I’m quitting now. And even my wife doesn’t have any idea how bad my problem was/is. Being completely worthless for a couple of weeks just isn’t an option for me. But then again, going back to the can isn’t an option either. I’ve worked myself into a tough spot here; any advice or insights would be welcome.

11 January as posted by NKT - Thanks for the replies. Even with the patch, it still feels like I have a fuzzy blanket wrapped tightly around my brain, and I needed a little kick in the ass. It hadn’t occurred to me that six days alone could be an opportunity rather than a challenge.

Just took the patch off and tossed the rest in the trash. They served their purpose of breaking the getting-high-on-nicotine-every-couple-of-hours cycle; now it's time to move on.



Edromero: look at all the day 6's. everyone took their last dip ever on new years. excellent! here's to a nicotine free 2009, you bitchy-ass hoes.

Wildcat99 - Day 13 - Dear Skoal, "quien es su papa, biatch"

Our new year's quitters
"This shit fucking sucks. everything i do is drowned and hollowed out by a constant presence of anxiety and depression. And it fucking blows that the cure to all of shit bull shit i'm going through is just a little pinch of tobacco to stick in my lip. And what blows even more is to know I cant have that. fuckin shit man....fuckin shit. fuck! " - Barsky9, failed quitter in the FOQer group April 2009



imaquitter: day 7, need to go buy big thing of gum, it is getting easier
imaquitter: hello ppl, i signed up last night, this is day 7 for me, its been a tough but good week, lookin forward to many days and weeks and months, and years, of being dip free



Bengalsgirl08- Day 5..where is wildcat?




BigHoss44 - Day 5, headache and cloud gone but craving still there
BigHoss44 - Day 6, no dip today...will be back tomorrow!



RoyJester - day 5, first post, the weekend sucked.
Royjester: I don't like wagons either, they Fucking suck, dong.
RoyJester - 6 - Fuck Chewbie Snax
RoyJester - 7 - what a shitty week, can only get better I suppose, look forward to it
Royjester: I hadn't spit in a cup since being a Sophmore in H.S. I have given up coffee, mostly, becuase I always had my morning joe w/ a morning chewbie snak. Now I'm drinking tea, I hate tea but it's better than the craving.
RoyJester - 8 - one fuckin' week down, many many to go.
RoyJester - 9 - nuts



Moe Man is pushing all his chips in. Day 2 first time on here. What a freaking fog yesterday was.




ed-13. not a big deal. got other fish to fry (an' shit).




ron3775 day 1 (I actually quit at 9 p.m. on the 31st. This is the first I was able to log in since. I am feeling pretty good and felt great getting rid of the can!

ron3775 - day 3 and feeling great! I am welcoming the fog and glad the rage hasn't happened yet. I know it can happen at any moment. I am avoiding going into stores right now to help out.

Ron3775 - 4. I was out last night and had a few beers, But I stayed quit.

ron3775 - Day 5 I am back to work and doing fine. No craving for a dip for the ride in. Fog has lifted for now. Thanks to all.




Wildcat:
day #1 is over. sucked major ass but it is done. pretty big for me because i don't think i have ever stopped dipping for 24 hours (very pathetic and embarrassing to even admit). Tomorrow I do it again. What is interesting though is that i think my penis grew by an inch from not chewing today. if i would have known this was going to happen i would have quit years ago.

wildcat99-day 2... sucks like crazy but i will not chew today.

Wildcat99-Day 3... I've got "fog grand central" going on here. Not sure whether I am coming or going. The only thing I do know is that I am not dipping. I will not chew today.

Wildcat Day 3: Hey folks... hope everyone had a good day today. I am foggy as hell and sort of dizzy. Work was hilarious today. Mainly because I just stared at my computer all day. Really didn't accomplish much of anything. Too foggy to be productive, worked for me. See you all at roll call in the morning.

~bom-chica waa waa

Wildcat: Holy shitballs today is tough... went to a movie with my wife, wanted a chew. came home and had a phat ass bowl of spagehtti (and 2 beers), now i want a chew. Came here looking for support as I made a promise this morning to all of you that i will not chew today!! And, I won't--swear!! Gonna have some more silver bullet to take my mind off of my ex-friend (skoal longcut wintergreen).
Grrrrrrrrrr.

Wildcat99- day 4... this sucks. I'm not very nice right now and I hate that.

Wildcat:Day 1-3 suck very bad. I'm on day 4... feels like time is standing still. Everyone on here says it gets better... I've got to believe you, otherwise you wouldn't have stayed quit. So, I keep on keepin on. Realizing that "if it were easy, everyone would do it".
~Word

Wildcat99- Day 5. I'm not 100% sure but I think the fog may be gone (or at least lifted). This site is saving my a$$. My family is great, but you guys are fighting the same fight. Thanks for being there!!

Wildcat: Am I hallucinating or something??? I could have sworn I posted roll today--but, I don't see my name on the list anymore. What the heck? Oh well, bottom line, I'm not chewing today. But, for the record...................... I want to really bad.

Wildcat: And, I just screwed that post up... crap--sorry about that. Well, i guess i posted some kind of roll--even if i did it wrong. I'm tough as nails. Grr.

Wildcat: had a suck ass dream last night and woke up with my dog's rectum about 7 inches from my face. I blew her a kiss. Rectum? Damn near killed um...

Wildcat99-Day 6... still want to dip, but still not going to. quittin, that's how i roll.

Wildcat: Smokey, i wasn't tryin to steal your thunder there... i'm just still an idiot with the whole message board thing. DAMN, i'm tryin.


ob1541:
My names OB. I'm on day 2. I've dipped for 25 years. I've been on day 2 before and it is the same hell I remember. Quiting tobacco is the easist thing I've ever done. I've done it a thousands times. This is my first time using a "support group." Hopefully I won't be as pathetic as those "F's" on Celeb Rehab. Well I've put alot of thought into quiting this time. I've got to get this right. Sorry if this seems like a incoherant ramble but IM IN A F-ING FOG.

ob1541-day 3, don't "f" with me right now!
ob1541-day 6 "present" and accounted for




ndrooster1 - okay day 6 for me and brand new to this board. (hope I am doing this in the right place) - tobacco free since December 29-08 but had to buy a can of bacc off today to get through the triggers..feels like cheating to me but if it helps??! 34 years of being chained to the snuffqueen


ndrooster1 - okay - NO Baccy for me today - starting day 7..gonna face "the lions den" as I will be at a place with lots of triggers. Armed with my water, gum and as a last resort - a tin of BaccOff (yuck!)

Rooster: I am on day 7 and I know exactly what you mean by time standing still......it is some of the weirdest sh*t I have experienced in a long time and it is some of the most frustrating. However, I think today it sped up some - I actually had a hour and a half fly by - but those first 6 days were tough, and it made it near impossible to work in my shop/studio. Can't remember in the past 34 years of chewin that the days went by so slow.....and the nights, I don't know if it is because of all the water I am drinking or if its the body adjustiing but I am lucky to sleep 4 hours straight through before having to get up, pee and get another drink. Then lay there and toss till I finally fall back to sleep -- very weird dreams too. But I too am determined to quit so I anguish through these spells. Had to have a pinch of Baccoff herbal stuff tonite though. That kinda has me spooked. Are you sure it is okay to go that route or is cutting off everything the best way? Were any of you able to wean yourself off the herbal stuff easily or is that gonna be a struggle (psychologically I know - not physically).

ndrooster1--starting day 7 - posted my introduction this morning on whatever page that is.

ndrooster - day 8 - had a dip dream last night, woke up with my mouth all dried out and a headache. WTF? Will not succumb today.

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Bike to the Reunion for Cancer Research

Hello to all you quitters out there.
Some news:

From 9-17 September this year I will be returning to my home town in WV to attend my 30th year high school reunion.

Since my graduation in 1980, I have lost two family members and my high school best friend to cancer. You guys can imagine how many dippers and smokers there are back in dem dere hills of WV.

Not to mention others that have battled and won against this killer including my father who has beat cancer twice but has had his right arm amputated in the face of this killer.

Believe me, some have lost more…….

I wanted to let you all know that in conjunction with my class reunion I'll be heading back “home” albeit via a different mode of transportation........

I will be riding my bicycle 600 miles from Redding, CT back to WV to attend my class reunion and also to raise awareness and support for cancer research

This ride will be in honor of everyone that has been impacted by this horrific disease to include all classmates, friends, family members and victims and survivors.

I hope you'll take a look at my trip itinerary that outlines the ride but more importantly I hope you’ll be able to make a simple donation of $5-$10 bucks to the American Cancer Society in support of cancer research. Believe me, anything is appreciated.

The link to my site is listed here:
Bike to the Reunion for Cancer Research

The direct link to the American Cancer Society site in support of the ride is located on the Bike to the Reunion Tour website above

Thank you all in advance.


TCOPE/Todd

P.S. Take a look at the interactive map of the ride and check back daily for updates, photos, and videos from the road.

P.S.S. Are there any KTC members along the ride route that I could visit??

Friday, July 24, 2009

Trip to Colorado


Niwot (Dennis), TCOPE (Todd), JPCrew (Jon), Rkymtnman (Jeff)


Wednesday, April 15, 2009

The Beginning of TCOPE-- 6 JANUARY 2009


Ladies & Gentlemen.............
Quitters and Cavers.............
I am quit. For 100 days today.

I got here one day at a time. I got here with a hell of a lot of pain and anguish. I got here for me. But most importantly I got here with the help of an interesting group of characters from an internet site called Kill The Can.

There are literally hundreds of posts on KTC talking about the effectiveness of the site and how to use the site. I, for one, didn't think it would work. I'm a pretty keep to myself guy but you know what?? As strange as it sounds, I kept a fucking promise that I couldn't keep to my family or myself. I kept a promise to a bunch of lunatics that I don't even know. And it saved my life.........

The blog you are reading now is, I guess, my HOF speech.

If you were in the FOQers of April 09, you'll probably see yourself somewhere included in my posts. My HOF speech/blog is divided up by week and meant to emphasize some of the things that I feel are important in getting past 100 days.

Many of you in the April group were essential to my quit although I'm sure you didn't know it at the time.
Neither did I until I began to look back over the posts and my diary for the 100 days.

Maybe it was a preposterous rant that one of you made that made me even angrier than I already was in fighting off the nic bitch.

Perhaps it was one of your humorous jabs at someone that made me smirk.

This blog is filled with my WEEKLY RULES FOR QUITTING TOBACCO AND GETTING TO THE HOF.
But more importantly this blog is filled with your funny posts, your serious posts, your ludicrous posts, your ranting posts and more.

Basically, you guys are my HOF speech.

I've approached it like this for a couple of reasons.
1. I want some concise place to go back to IF I EVER EVEN CONTEMPLATE CAVING. Yes, I will continue to use the KTC site but I want to also have a back up. Believe me, reading what you wrote 100 days ago is reassuring!! This is an even deeper commitment from me to you.

2. I wanted to document some bit of history for the guys and gals of this group. There are probably over a million posts (exageration) for our group. This pulls some of the good ones. Hopefully you'll enjoy reading as well. This was YOUR quit as well as MINE. Together it was OURS.

So from a HOF speech it's pretty lame. However, YOU GUYS ARE my Hall of Fame. Listening to your words is the only way that I got here. They helped me to formulate the RULES OF THE WEEK and I am sharing them with you today.

Take a glance at each of my posts/weeks. They lead you through our 100 days and each post is divided up into what I formulated as my guiding principals for my quit and followed by your words and wisdom in the form of posts.

For those of you that want the CLIFF NOTES VERSION:
14 WEEKS OF RULES INCLUDE:
WEEK 1: COMMITTMENT
WEEK 2: CONFUSION
WEEK 3: COMMUNITY
WEEK 4: ACCOUNTABILITY
WEEK 5: FIRST TIMES
WEEK 6: LOVE
WEEK 7: ATTITUDE
WEEK 8: PLAN
WEEK 9: FREEDOM
WEEK 10: ENJOY BUT BEWARE
WEEK 11: COUNT YOUR MONEY
WEEK 12: HELP A BUDDY
WEEK 13: WRITE AND REFLECT
WEEK 14 (HOF): DREAM

Enjoy them all and a nostalgic look back at the first 100 days of the April FOQers.

TCOPE (Todd Copley)

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Week One - 6-12 January 2009--- COMMITTMENT


Getting to Know the Nic Bitch
My 1st Post on 6 January 2009 -
TCOPE - Day 1 ----Signing in today for the first time. Time to quit. Have not had a dip all day today. How do you do this roll call thing? TCOPE

With those feeble words I began my journey to quit. What got me to this point was a 30+ year love affair with Copenhagen tobacco. My latest trip to the dentist yesterday was not pleasant with teeth all screwed up and gums in bad shape. I threw out my cans on the way home. My inlaws had been visiting and were leaving on this day. God, I needed a dip.
My son also celebrated his 4th birthday this week on 3 January. I should have quit on that day but needed one more can to get me through. How pathetic.

My 1st week was filled with anger, stress, triggers, and depression. Every thing I did, I did for the first time without nicotine/tobacco. It was a revelation.

That week I also did a 800 mile road trip as well all alone!!! My god, if I didn't cave during that then I thought maybe I can do this!

Week One for me is about COMMITTMENT. If you can't commit to yourself and the people here then come back at another time. It's going to hurt but this committment will save your life. Oh yeah, one other thing. Start keeping some notes or a diary about your quit. It helps and when it comes time to write your HOF guess what? You'll be ready!

RULE FOR WEEK #1: You better be prepared to COMMIT more deeply than you have ever done in your life. If you're not ready then go die.
POST ONE DAY AND ONLY ONE DAY AT A TIME. FOREVER WILL TAKE CARE OF ITSELF _______________________________________________________________
Highlights/Posts and thoughts for the week to include your posts:
TCOPE - Day 2 Going to bed. Day 2 worse than day 1 for sure. Lots of triggers (needed to go outside and do some work in the yard). Still I held out. Tobacco free for two days. Good night.
8 Jan
TCOPE - Day 3 - Another quit day for me too. I've got a long drive today which will be a huge trigger but I'll get through.

My Intro that I posted
I'm not so internet savvy and am just learning the workings of this site. Found this intro site and although I quit 10 days ago I never posted anything. Thought I'd rectify that. Here's the details:- 46 years old and been dipping since I was 14- Had about 3 decent quits in my life but none of them lasted:
1. Ranger School 1988 - Forbidden and I went 58 days without. Got back on immediately after
2. Graduate school in London, England - You can't buy Cope in EuropeUsed to go to the U.s. Embassy store and buy it there
3. July 2006 - First self imposed quit. Lasted 20 days or so.This time I will quit. My dentist said I'm all fucked up. I have periodontal disease and will now be treated for that. So far no cancer but it's not confirmed.Dip was with me all my life. Single, married, with children. It is probably the oldest "friend" I have. But no longer.....I'm done and that's the story in a very short version that all you guys can and have repeated around the globe.I'm quit

And much more importantly are those posts that helped me that week:

7 Jan from Loot
One day you’ll get it. It took most of us a long time…many years in fact, before we had our “moment of clarity”. For most of us, it was finding a stupid website of all things. Realizing we were not alone. Accepting the fact that we were addicts and that we needed help because we were not strong enough to do it alone.It astonishes LOOT every single time someone here caves after having been exposed to this site for extended periods of time. You didn’t use the site. You may have understood… but ya just couldn’t fucking buy in to the whole accountability thing huh? People, total fucking strangers, bend over backwards to keep you clean. They offer phone numbers, e-mail addys, etc. and ya still don’t fucking get it.

LOOT is 1300+ days clean. LOOT has been through hell over this shit too. LOOT has been in a position to want to throw it all away when the price seemed to high…many times. The only thing that has pulled LOOT’s ass from certain death is the fact that he’s made a select few people a promise. A promise LOOT could never keep to his wife, his sons, and worse…LOOT’s own self. And LOOT expects the same in return from them…and they goddamned know it too. That’s the whole premise of roll call. 100 days seems like an eternity sitting at 7. But…in reality, 100 days ain’t shit. This is a life sentence we all handed ourselves. Try and blame others if you want to…perpetrate that fraud…but it’s bullshit. LOOT doesn’t know what else to say except some quality time in the Welcome Center is warranted for you newbs. Make sure you understand the level of commitment people are putting into your sorry ass every time they sign roll with you.

It’s time consuming and fucking draining…mentally and emotionally draining to know you’ve wasted your fucking time.LOOT’s about certain most of you fucks have quit reading by now…for those that haven’t…read it a fucking gain until you have your moment of clarity. It’s really pretty fucking simple. We can’t do it for you, but we can help you do it…only if you let us though.*LOOT hangs his fuckin head, shaking that big sumbitch side to side*You fuckin had it too man…you fuckin had it. Right in front of you.


7 Jan
Sweenz - 258 - "Ultimately, we are all dead men. Sadly, we can't chose how but we can chose how we meet that end." My end will come without my face rotting off. How about you?

Posted: Jan 7, 2009, 8:58 am
If I may suggest something to occupy the time and unbridaled rage you may experience today. Have a co-worker or close family member kick you in the balls at 15 minute intervals. That should be just about enough time between blows for you to catch your breath and realize you never want to experience that again. Kind of like quitting. The first 3 or 4 days suck. Then you get to un-fuck what dip has done to your mind and never have to experience day 1 thru 4 again. You have made a fantastic decision and your lives will get better soon. If you need any help, send me a PM and my number is yours. Congrats! This post has been edited by ksweeney3 on Jan 7, 2009, 8:59 am

I truly had never seen a girl that dipped snuff and I come from backwoods WV. Christ, she wasn't bad looking either!! Melanie where did you go????

Loot best sums it up below:
Loot digs chicks with handcuffs
guns are cool too
badges ROCK!
look for a PM



Posted: Jan 9, 2009, 9:29 am
I JUST READ THE FOLLOWING IN SWEENZ' HOF SPEECH. IT WAS SO DAMN GOOD, I JUST HAD TO PASTE IT ELSEWHERE. IT'S ALMOST CHURCHILLIAN. AT LUNCH I'M GONNA GO BUY A CASE OF SPRAYPAINT AND FIND ME SOME HIGHWAY OVERPASSES. PURE GENIUS:

"We have the right to watch our children grow and have earned the right to participate in their lives. We will not be denied. Success can be our only option now. We can never tire, give up, fail, or falter. We are worth more than this addiction and will stop at nothing to beat it."
--------------------
Insanity: Doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting a different result.

QUOTE (ksweeney3 @ Jan 9, 2009, 9:29 am)
QUOTE (TCOPE @ Jan 9, 2009, 11:19 am)
QUOTE (rkymtnman @ Jan 9, 2009, 9:13 am)
QUOTE (TCOPE @ Jan 9, 2009, 7:32 am)
Man, I was feeling pretty cocky about 4 days without dip when I read that this misery is still there at 89 days and causes a cave. Christ - I can't believe how strong this shit is. Mike, hang in there.
I was right there as well TCOPE - then came days 12-14 and a funk I can't possibly describe. Get a plan ready because it almost cost me my quit since I had no plan - that issue has been fixed thanks to the awesome support of this board.
Hmmm..... What type of plan did you put together? Right now I've been stocked up on the fake shit but ultimately need to back away from that too.

TCOPE
A plan for when the going gets tough can be something similar to:Crave comes: Insert seeds/gum/candy etc into your grill and tell crave to fuck offCrave persists: come to KTC and read, and look at cancer pics and tell crave to fuck off (If you posted roll already, you can't go back on your word)Crave persists: go into chat and/or call quit brothers and ask for permission to cave (Likely your plan will stop here) Also tell crave to fuck offCrave persists: print out the contract to cave and sign it while telling crave to fuck off.Crave persists: stare down your family and friends and let them know you are a useless piece of shit that is going to make them suffer while telling crave to fuck off. Crave persists still: Slam your nuts in a drawer while telling crave to fuck off.You don't have to do it exactly this way but having multiple steps and layers of defense can help insure you stay quit in a bad situation.

Wildcat 99

Trying to post this from my blackberry... We'll see if it works. I'm showing day 7 that I'm in control of this muther trucker!!! Just got to the airport and have a bit of a wait. The dude I am sitting next to us balls deep in a fat ass chew. I'm balls deep in some Hubba bubba!! Quien es su papa nic bitch???


Tfurrh
Posted: Jan 8, 2009, 9:03 am
QUOTE (rkymtnman @ Jan 8, 2009, 8:00 am)
QUOTE (edromero @ Jan 8, 2009, 7:56 am)
is your screen name short for "ricki martin man"?
I do love those boy bands. You caught me.
make you take your clothes off and go dancing in the rain........livin' la vida loca

QUOTE (jpine @ Jan 8, 2009, 7:55 am)
QUOTE (rkymtnman @ Jan 8, 2009, 8:54 am)
rkymtnman - 15 - the FUNK SUCKS
if you do this right you only have to do it once. 15 days is awesome. great job


Rooster
Posted: Jan 9, 2009, 5:16 pm
QUOTE
Yeah................................I know I won't dip. It doesn't take away from me wanting it thoughI just wish there was something just as easy to take its place. but there's nothing
My dad once told me if you put wishes in one hand and shit in the other - which will you have more of? Wishes get you no where and shit stinks so a person has to make a real choice as to what you want and what are you actually going to do to attain that goal? Walk the walk. We ALL CRAVE it, but none of us on this board "want it" or else we wouldn't be here -- the tough part is being man (or woman) enough to crave and want freedom from the nic bitch more. Your right - there ain't nothing "out there" to take its place -- the easy part was getting hooked on the shit. I am 34 years of battling these craves - all of my adult life and then some. Together we can kick it. Stay with the the thought - your freedom is worth more than this trial! Rooster



kd4jet
Posted: Jan 10, 2009, 12:55 pm
QUOTE (bhfive @ Jan 10, 2009, 10:42 am)
About how many days until I stop reaching in my pocket for a can that is not there?

I think but i'm not sure it's the day after they kick dirt in your face !
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I am the sum and total of all my life experiences and it's lessons !Quit Date 07/25/2008HOF Date 11/01/2008




Posted: Jan 12, 2009, 11:13 am
QUOTE (ksweeney3 @ Jan 12, 2009, 6:57 am)
QUOTE (NKT @ Jan 12, 2009, 5:06 am)
NKT - Day 1 - no nicotine for me today
Today is the first day of the rest of your life. It will require hard work, determination, focus, blood, sweat, and tears. But when you think about it what good things in life don't?

Sex.

Monday, April 13, 2009

Week Two - 13 - 19 January 2009---CONFUSION


Week of Confusion
If Week One is about Committment then Week 2 is definitely about Confusion:

Do I REALLY WANT to do this??
Who am I kidding?
No way I can go longer than a week without dip.
Maybe I can??....
I'm confused and in a fog.
As the nicotine began to lift from my body I was dazed and confused.
I saw it in the posts I saw as well from my fellow quitters.
The challenge is to break through the CONFUSION.
This is NOTHING to be confused about and revert back to your new found committment that you had in Week 1 when you decided to quit this nasty habit.
Your CONFUSION will disappear and the light will shine..........
RULE FOR WEEK #2: Battle through the CONFUSION. Your commitment is still valid and strong. Move to Week 3 and prepare for Community
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Highlights/Posts and thoughts for this week

I took a look at my car to prepare for a road trip this week. My car is a wreck. Still spit cans hid under the seats. If I could vacuum up all the snuff on the floor mats or seats I would have a roll of Copenhagen. It's sick. Can you believe I did this shit. I would take my wife out on a date in this car. How in the hell could she stand it. I know she hated it.
During this week I returned back from my road trip to West Virginia.

My father had been hospitalized and we thought it was the end. He had been delirious and his large intestine was poisoning him. He began to improve during my visit but there was a lot of stress.

I was using the fake stuff pretty heavily. It helped.

When I returned to CT I had continual visits to the Dentist for work. Also I was focused on looking for a new job since I had been laid off at the end of the year. Try sitting behind a desk all friggin day looking at a computer screen without a dip!!

Basically this is where I was ready to quit quitting. If it weren't for posting roll every day then I'd have been gone. I also started keeping statistics on the members of the April HOF. I had to frigging do something or I'd lose my mind. It kept me glued to the site all day and updating my stupid spreadsheet. Ultimately, I thought it was good and I had positive comments from other members. Those that were'nt posting hated me though. Fuck them. Most of them Caved anyway.

WHAT WAS HAPPENING ON THE SITE THAT WEEK

Do you guys remember during this week there was A LOT OF funny discussion on what we were going to name the group?? Funny shit.

I've included some of those posts here

This was also the week that I was exposed to JPINE!

Here's some of my favorite posts that week

imaquitter
This one was great from imaquitter. Great realization.

Posted: Jan 13, 2009, 5:23 am
today is gonna be a good day. why? you ask, because today is another day that i will not falter in my goal of not using tobacco. it is a day of joy. last nite i was in chat. this guy came in and was thinkin about quittin. i know i havent been here long, but man, i went off on the dude. not cussin him or anything, but tellin him theres a whole different world out there, one without dip. anyway, i went on for about 5 minutes with this guy, it felt great. hopefully he'll be back. to this wonderful world of quit. anyhoo, just wanted to share that, thanksimaquitter
--------------------
Chinese proverb: The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single stepQuit date 1-1-09
_____________________________________________________________

Jpine

This one made me fucking howl!!
Posted: Jan 13, 2009, 10:22 am
QUOTE (Daniel_J @ Jan 13, 2009, 9:14 am)
but now i know where am at and where i wanna be and ya'll will be there with me until then...

Jpine: you are on your knees in front of me, and you will be there until then
Posted: Jan 13, 2009, 11:50 am
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Redtrain
Sound philosophy from Redtrain

Posted: Jan 13, 2009, 12:07 pm
QUOTE (tfurrh @ Jan 13, 2009, 10:51 am)
QUOTE (BigDBingo @ Jan 13, 2009, 9:50 am)
Ok guys, I'm in. Today is my quit. Killed a can of pouches yesterday, bummed a dip off my brother last night, and woke up this morning determined to kill this habit. I was able to avoid my usual shower dip this morning, and so far havent had a work dip yet today. i have three pieces of super strong gum packed in where the dip would be, feeling the minty burn. I think this quit will be my final quit.BigD

this will be your final quit. welcome to April.

Redtrain: Don't think, thinking gets you in trouble, just quit.
_______________________________________________________________
Bengalgirl

Here's where we contemplated the name Ass Bandits!! I think Rooster almost fucking quit over that one!!!Posted: Jan 13, 2009, 3:25 pm
QUOTE (Remshot @ Jan 13, 2009, 1:19 pm)
QUOTE (mule21 @ Jan 13, 2009, 1:18 pm)
QUOTE (WhoDey @ Jan 13, 2009, 2:13 pm)
QUOTE (Big Brother Jack @ Jan 13, 2009, 2:09 pm)
QUOTE (edromero @ Jan 13, 2009, 2:07 pm)
QUOTE (jpine @ Jan 13, 2009, 1:04 pm)
QUOTE (Armypatt @ Jan 13, 2009, 2:00 pm)
So I had an idea and wanted to see what all of you think.A lot of boards or groups have nick names. Like March, the group before us is playing off the Irish theme.So I thought since we're April and in life there are 2 certainties, death and taxes.And April 15 is Tax day (Which just happens to be my HOF day!!!!!)We could play off that theme.Just a thought.

are you asking for suggestions? i would be more than happy to help

i gotta hear this...let it rock, jp

* BBJ pulls up a chair and is ready for the show .....

ASS BANDITS!!!!

RICK ROLL'S RAIDERShttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0
April's Ass Bandits does have a nice ring to it.


this will be twice i have been deemed an ass bandit.. last time for a brief period.
____________________________________________________________



Jpine
Again Jpine nails it!!!

Posted: Jan 13, 2009, 4:24 pm
QUOTE (imaquitter @ Jan 13, 2009, 3:22 pm)
not everyone is an ass clown, and i dont want to be one


you a butt pirate quitter?


______________________________________________________________

Rooster
Sorry but I removed my name from the roll call of April butt pirates...thats not who I signed up with. It will remain off any and all roll calls until this shit stops. I can take a joke and name calling in a joking way as well as anybody, and if you knew me, probably better than most of you, but ass bandits, assclowns and butt pirates are too degrading for me. I know this statement is like "taking my ball and going home" but sorry I don't have to be treated like shit by the ones who went before us -- especially when I am working on something positive. If I was a caver I would expect the childish name calling. I thought a lot of positive about this organization in the short time I have ben a member but it seems to be going down a path I do not want to travel. And trust me when I say I am not overly sensitive cuz I sure as hell ain't. ndrooster

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Week Three - 20-26 January 2009--- COMMUNITY - I'm a FOQer


Okay, explain that to my wife. I'm a FOQer.
In Week 3 you will begin to get to know your fellow quitters. You'll get a feel for their personalities and what motivates (or demotivates) them. It's interesting.
Here again we've been thrown into a group of men (and women) from around the country that we don't know.
We don't know their background.
We don't know what they do
We don't even know their names!!
But somehow we begin to bond and form a community. It is sustaining and refreshing.
These are the guys that during this week you need to get their emails and phone numbers.
Expand the internet based community and TALK TO FUCKING SOMEONE!!!!!!
In 100 days these guys will be your friends.
RULE FOR WEEK #3: Become a part of and support your local COMMUNITY.
________________________________________________________________
Highlights/Posts and thoughts from this week
This week I was back in CT and of course praying for a dip. But everytime I thought about it I went back to the site.

I have to stay busy. I have to be distracted. In order to do that I devised ways to calculate the percentages of the FOQers roll posting habits. I separated our group into different categories based on how frequently they posted. I sent notes out every night on this shit.
If I didn't do this then I'd cave. That's what I told myself.

This was the week that BLF got relegated to May for the cigarette he smoked and the legendary "mushroom stamp" comment was formulated!!!

Here's some posts I enjoyed that week:

The mushroom stamp is born!
Posted: Jan 21, 2009, 10:01 pm
minxGroup: MembersPosts: 152Member No.: 5,470Joined: 30-October 08

----- CAN"T BE PART OF THE GROUP ------To : The April Group, The 7 or 8 who sent me personal E-mails last evening & to those assholes who think their prick is bigger than mine :I would like to apologize for failing the group. I really, really feel bad about letting you down. For those of you unaware; I had a cigarette on Saturday night and thought I was safe since I did not dip; ( I apparently did not read all the rules ), however, it seems this counts as a “cave”. So …. I had a really, really shit day Monday & even a worse one Tuesday - ( work & family related ) – I came here last night and asked the question "Am I still good to go since I only smoked a cigarette and did not dip!” ( I guess I thought deep down that perhaps this was not an exception to the rule ) And to my surprise … or to what I thought, this did not make everything peachy kin with my quite. So ….. having 2 REALLY SHITY days back to back and then to find out that my 20 days of No Dip was null and void by having 1 smoke …. Well it really pissed me off and then a couple of assholes in here proceeded to chastise me like a 3 year old and that pushed me over the edge …. I left here with every intention of buying a can and finishing it last evening. Well … I didn’t b/c I still have been off dip for 21 days … I did buy a pack of smokes and had 2 last night and a couple today … So … I lost / failed …. I hate smoking and am actually allergic to it. But it pissed me off that I did not read all the rules and my quite was voided by 1 mistake - - - my fault - - - I should have read all the rules - - - I thought I was getting around the rules & still keeping my promise. I wish all in April 09 luck & I still have not had a dip - - - but - - - have broken the rules and need to get through some shit before I can l get geared back up and kick all nic and hopefully be back hear to post next monthTo those who e-mailed - - - Sincere heart felt thank you & I am so sorry I did not live up to your expectationsTo those assholes who I am pretty sure are gay; that thought it was funny to chastise me last evening ----- if I ever find you alone in ally …. I will rip open your skull & shit down your throat & just before you die … I say hey, yeah, you beat the nic & I didn’t … but … MY DICK IS STILL BIGGER - - - then I will take it out and mushroom stamp your fucking faggot forehead !!!
_________________________________________________________


This was from Animal/Dean and it showed his struggle. I loved this:
Tobacco: A good habit to break
We took the picture, though we admit it isn’t pretty.Thursday’s Goshen News included a special section titled “Healthy Living.” The cover photo was of someone — in this case “hand model” Michael Wanbaugh, The News’ managing editor — pinching a generous portion of chewing tobacco. However unsightly, the photo highlighted an article we were happy to publish.The article was about Wakarusa resident Dean Weldy, who’s working to break his smokeless tobacco habit. Weldy has gone 180 days or so tobacco-free. The News wishes him continued success.The “Healthy Living” piece also pointed out that help is available for those serious about going tobacco-free. And that help can be found online.Weldy has benefited from the Internet site killthecan.org. Members join a “quit group,” communicate through a bulletin board, and are able to telephone or e-mail each other. Support is important, and that support being available via the Internet makes sense in 2009.What makes more sense, in our view, is never using tobacco products in the first place.Much has been written about the ills of cigarettes, chewing tobacco, etc. Summing it up is easy: This stuff can kill you. Still, young people mindful of medical evidence continue to take up the habit. That’s perplexing and sad.The News applauds the Dean Weldys of the world who’ve decided to make a change. They’ve made the right choice. We also think the right choice can be made a bit earlier.
________________________________________________________

Something led me to believe there were homosexual tendencies in our group ha ha ha!!
Posted: Jan 26, 2009, 2:16 am
A fucking clit!
Group: MembersPosts: 229Member No.: 4,157Joined: 2-July 08
QUOTE (montywa @ Jan 26, 2009, 12:10 am)
QUOTE (Lance from SD @ Jan 25, 2009, 9:59 pm)
chanilla - day 10 - had a succesful night out with the guys and gals and no tobacco
I seriously doubt the "gals" portion of your roll call chanilla, but im glad you and your buddies on the diving team had fun last night.

oh yeah? Well you can suck my --- wait....
_______________________________________________

This showed us still fucking with the April name. Tfurrh came up with this.
Posted: Jan 27, 2009, 2:59 pm
I may look like a King, but I'm really the Duke.Group: MembersPosts: 1,768Member No.: 5,716Joined: 25-November 08
QUOTE (imaquitter @ Jan 27, 2009, 12:56 pm)
HOW ABOUTTHE NIC KILLIN, ROLL BUMPIN, APRIL QUITTERS!!!feel free to adlib this, or add some "fuckin" or "shittin" or whatevers


If we can fit BabyGreggie in there somewhere, I'm game.